Things to Stop being Embarrassed About

I have no way to preface this gracefully so here goes – there are certain things you should never be embarrassed about when it comes to your wedding.  These things include:

1. Your budget. It is what it is – whether you have $5000 or $50,000 or $500,000.  What you have to spend is what you have to spend.  Please stop being embarrassed about how much money you have to spend on your wedding and start making sure you are spending it wisely.  If you stretch the truth, either that you have more or less than you really do, you are doing yourself a great disservice.  This is especially true when it comes to working with your planner.  We don’t want you to go over budget or fall in love with a vendor who you simply can’t fit in your budget.  Conversely, we want to recommend vendors who you will love but not if we don’t think you can afford them.  If we don’t know you have the money to work with, that little hidden gem of a photographer, a florist or a venue will never be on the table.  If you are working with a planner who charges a flat fee, you have absolutely no reason to lie about the budget – we aren’t going to make more money because your budget goes up.  Please give us the whole picture from the beginning so we can help you have the most amazing wedding possible!

2. Your weight. Every bride is beautiful.  Every.  Single.  One.  I don’t care if you are a size 2 or a size 32 – you will be absolutely beautiful on your wedding day.  And who cares what anyone else thinks?  Your fiance thinks you are the most beautiful, amazing, awesome, fantastic woman in the world, right?  Order your dress in the right size, eat real food, workout and enjoy your engagement knowing when you walk down the aisle, you will be gorgeous just as you are and the man you are walking towards won’t be able to take his eyes off you.

3. Your differences. I really thought long and hard about this one but I feel like it needs to be addressed in some way.  When I say differences, I mean everything – from color blindness to illnesses to obvious and not so obvious disabilities.  If your groom to be can’t stand or walk for long periods of time, please tell me so I don’t suggest you visit places for pictures that require a long walk to get to the pretty.  If you have diabetes and we need to watch your blood sugar levels so you don’t pass out, please tell me so I can keep an eye on you!  If you can’t distinguish shades of red from one another, please tell me so we can approach color selection and floral work differently.  I can’t help you to the best of my ability if I don’t know exactly what I need to take into consideration – I don’t know what I don’t know.

4. Your family. Some families got extra buckets when they were passing out the crazy.  It isn’t your fault but your vendors really need to know if Aunt Edna gets drunk at every function and tries to kiss the potted ferns.  We also need to know who gets along and who doesn’t – if your uncles haven’t spoken because Fred hit Charlie in the head with a golf ball (accidentally, of course) and it resulted in an all out brawl including a pond ala Happy Gilmore…well, they probably should not be seated anywhere near each other.  Let me know what could happen so we can try to help prevent it before it happens and/or manage it if it does!

5. Your priorities. Everyone has those one or two things that are really important to them when it comes to the wedding.  For some people, that is the food; for others, it might be the dress or the flowers.  Those are what are important to you and that is fine, just make sure your choices aren’t going to make your guest’s experience less than phenomenal.  A good planner will steer you away from doing anything too drastic or detrimental – i.e. not ordering enough chairs and tables for a sit down dinner or under-ordering food or not reserving a tent for an outdoor November wedding.

Please stop being embarrassed about these things already, okay?!  Keeping your vendors in the dark won’t help us help you, in fact it can be downright detrimental to your planning and your resulting wedding!

3 Responses to “Things to Stop being Embarrassed About”

  1. Elena Says:

    All I can say is AMEN. I tell my brides all the time to allow themselves to feel beautiful, regardless their age or size. We have to embrace what we cannot change at that very moment and enjoy the very special time of our life that we dream for such a long time and spend our hard earned money on.

  2. isha | isha foss events Says:

    Very nice post. Could not agree more!

  3. kortni Says:

    amazing post! it made me stop and take a deep breath. i needed that, thank you!