Are all your vendors on the same page?

Have you seen this video?!  It has gone viral and for good reason – it is more than a little cringe worthy!


Can’t you just feel how uncomfortable the bride and groom are when the minister STOPS the ceremony and reprimands the photographer and videographer for doing their jobs?  Holy. Goodness. Gracious.

So who is really to blame here?  Honestly?  Everyone – bride and groom included.  (Yes, even them although to a much, much lesser extent.)

To start, let me say that I can sort of see where the confusion came from as this was an outdoor wedding.  Often officiants at outdoor, non-house of worship locations tend to be more laid back than those in a house of worship. (so not the case here, but I digress) Churches have set rules, Synagogues have set rules, a field doesn’t usually have set rules but that doesn’t mean there aren’t any rules.

Truth be told, I put the majority of the blame on the minister – he should have made it clear to the bride and groom that he has rules for and expectations of his ceremonies.  He also should have talked with the photographer and videographer prior to the ceremony to let them know where they were allowed to be during the ceremony.  But let’s be clear, he KNEW they were there before he started the whole shebang.  I don’t know if he assumed they would move but they didn’t – his fault for not asking.  Bear in mind the video camera is almost always on a tripod so it wasn’t like they snuck up on him – rolled up on him maybe but not snuck!  Bottom line is the minister should NOT have stopped the ceremony – that was just plain tacky and frankly sort of horrifying.

The photographer and videographer should have found the minister prior to the ceremony and asked if he had any restrictions on where they could shoot from. They should have asked if standing behind the minister was okay but I can see where they assumed it was – the minister never said anything to them before the ceremony started even though they were STANDING BEHIND HIM!!!

Finally, the bride and groom should have told their minister if photo and video were a priority and really, they usually are.  They also should have clarified with the minister what his rules were so that could be managed.  That way if the minister had rules that the bride and groom didn’t agree with, they could have either asked him to change them or found another minister.

I guess the bride and groom have a heck of a story to tell on their 50th wedding anniversary and some crazy video to share. Side note: what a beautiful bride!!

Overall, it was pretty awful and I am very glad it didn’t happen at one of my weddings (not to say I haven’t had a few things that were also cringe worthy happen)!  It does serve as a not so gentle reminder to make even more sure that everyone is on the same page well before the ceremony begins.

So what do you think?  I’d love to hear your thoughts on this cringe worthy, viral video.


Wedding season is almost wrapped up so we’ll have LOTS of pretties to share very soon.  Meanwhile, make sure you are following @EDEPWeddings on Instagram and Emilie Duncan Event Planning on Facebook for sneak peeks.

Shout out to Kathy, a recent Mother of the Groom who is an avid blog follower.  Hi Kathy!!

Happy Thursday to all!

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